Monday, November 19, 2012

Weight loss (or the lack there of)

I need something fast that doesn't include fasting. I hate the way my body looks lately--- the giggle that my thighs made today made me shiver at the thought of being nekked. Especially makes me worry about what my poor husband has to be seeing as I disrobe! The dark- she is my friend!!

I have done Weight Watchers. It is complicated- I know, I know. They've tried to make it as simple as possible what with the "points" system, but I hate carrying around a book or logging in to my phone every time I put a bite in my mouth. Then, the whole concept of saving points till I need to splurge--- let's just say, I don't have points left over to splurge with! I DO like the idea that I can eat what ever I want. But I guess I can't have 2 pieces of Pizza Hut Meat Lovers pizza AND the cinnastix in the same day unless I eat NOTHING else all day long. Not my idea of a good diet.

We did the HCg diet that Dr. Oz has a strong opinion about- he still hasn't decided that it's a good or a bad diet. I can say this- if you can't give yourself an injection, don't waste your time or money on the "under the tongue" sublingual drops. They just take too long! The injections really do work so long as you stick to the diet that Dr. Simeons prescribes. But that's the problem for me. I see that peanut butter and jelly sandwich that my baby boy has only half eaten and left on his plate. And I just can't resist the sticky and sweet spread between two honey wheat sitting on that Mickey Mouse plate! The diet Dr. Simeons prescribes includes one of about 20 vegetable choices, 100 g of very lean meat, and a handful of fruit or an apple or orange. Twice a day. Coffee for breakfast. For 40 days. It is the longest 40 days I've ever lived. I can imagine poor Noah and his family and their diet those 40 days and nights on the arc and believe it couldn't be worse than this diet!

Adkins, South Beach, and other fad diets are a way for me to lose about 10 pounds then gain 20. I suppose I could get off my butt and exercise, but the last time I did that (back in July) I broke my heel doing jumping jacks! However, I do have a will to get this weight off. A goal that I've made is to run/walk the Color Run in Fondren this March during the Zippity-Doo-Dah weekend to raise money for the "chirren" of the Blair Batson hospital. And if I get to the point where I can do that, I suppose my giggly thighs will be pretty enough to wear my costume to march in the parade!

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Hair appointments

I can measure my life based on my hair styles. It started when I was little, taking the scissors to my own locks. That's what started my days of the pixie cut. Then, as my hair grew out some, my grandmother Nanny gave me toilet paper perms to put a little curl into my short tresses, making me look more like a poodle than Shirley Temple (whom I had really hoped to resemble).

As a teenager, we had a swimming pool AND a hot tub in the backyard. I had shoulder length hair by 7th grade, and I loved to swim across the pool without getting my whole head wet. A couple of passes across the pool then I'd go sit in the hot tub. You can guess what happened to the ends of my hair-- green. With church the next day, Mom gave me two options: cut or color. I chose color, and I haven't seen my original hair color since!

I've been different shades of blonde, red, brown, and even pink when I wear my Pinkie wig! Lengths have changed, as well as different patterns of highlights. Today, I'm headed to my latest salon appointment and getting my current style redone. Roots are atrocious to me, and I'm about to have to donn a ball cap to go out in public! A big thanks to my in-laws and their birthday gift that is funding today's trip to the beauty parlor!

According to my students, I'll be getting the rockstar 'do again. They asked why I did the bright blond around my face, and I giggled as I explained that a rock star must have awesomely cool hair!

Sunday, April 1, 2012


We've had several celebrations this week, the least being my passing of another year. 37. It has been 19 years since I turned 18. Do you ever think in those terms? I can't seem not to. I consider all the things I wanted to do and what I've actually accomplished. Let's just say this: I never got to join the Peace Corps, I never got my master's degree, and I still haven't blasted off into space as an astronaut. Ok, that last one was left behind as a dream when I was in 7th grade, but only because I found put astronauts had to be in peak physical condition and I had trouble running a mile in gym class.

So what have I done since high school? I do have a college degree, I did get started on a career using it (unlike several friends I know). I have had several loves, eventually falling in love with my husband, marrying, having babies with him. We are homeowners, something fewer people can boast about these days. I have modern toys, a pool in the backyard, and enough that we can go out to dinner once or twice a week. I have a few great friends, many good friends.

Birthdays make me consider all my blessings. Thank you, Lord, for blessing me! I'll try to remember all of these things when I want to complain about a First World problem later this week.

Monday, March 26, 2012

Turning Mommy to the "Off" Position for a few days...

My family did without me this weekend. I took off Thursday afternoon for a time of decadent retreat (notice I'm not saying relaxing!) with a terrific crew of people called the Sweet Potato Queens. Jackson, Mississippi, didn't know what to think when we arrived and began playing and partying at the Hilton on County Line or in the awesome neighborhood of Fondren, a friendly area going through a renaissance. We shopped, we danced, we dressed in crazy costumes. We even made some great friends as we called ourselves the "Prim and Improper Queens". My favorite moment of the weekend? When my new friend, Lil Jen, won the Big A-- Crown in the raffle. She was absolutely fabulous being crowned by THE Sweet Potato Queen herself, Jill Connor Brown. Well, that and finding two new drinks, one at Babalu and the other at Sal and Mookie's, that will knock your socks off they're so tasty!!

If you haven't ever heard of this, bless your heart. You are now assigned homework. Download, purchase, borrow (I really don't care how you get it) the Sweet Potato Queens Book of Love. It's the first one she wrote, and it gives the basis of my reasons for wearing a crown throughout the year, not just one weekend in March. Why do I wear a crown? Easy. I don't need an official pageant organization to tell me I am awesome. I already know it. (Modesty isn't one of my strong suits!) I love ME, jiggly rotund belly and all. I truly believe that if more women put on crowns every once in a while, we'd rarely have incidences of domestic violence because those women just wouldn't put up with the crap.

Next year, after you've read at least one of the books, how about turning off your Mommy switch and join me and about 500 of my closest friends as we kick up our heels and try out some new dance steps as we celebrate our uniqueness as the Bouffants rock out on the Big Hair Ball stage! (Hint Hint, Jill! We want them back at the Hilton!!) You might even try out some Habanero Tequila Lil Jen serves up in the Cantina!

Sunday, March 4, 2012

To RedShirt or Not, That is my Question...

No one told me this when I was in love and dreaming of marriage and children, but there are a lot more requirements on a woman's time than just keeping house and ensuring that your family has meals at least twice a day. Ok fine, three times a day. Plus snacks. And juice. Gah, such needy people!

Anyways, now that I have had children, I seem to have an ear for news that deals with children. Yep, the 7 year old is no longer allowed to shop for toys at WalMart while I am two aisles away because of that video of a child nearly being kidnapped but wasn't, praise God. I also limit the television shows that my kids watch because of the way the children treat adults, especially those in positions of authority.

But now, I have a new issue to think about regarding my youngest. His birthday is in the middle of June. As he ages, he will always be one of the youngest in his class at school. When he starts school, he will be 5 till the June before he enters first grade. He will continue, one of the babies in his class, through high school, where, as a sophomore, he will not even be able to get his driver's license until the summer before his junior year. He will be catching rides from buddies or Mom and Dad when some of his pals will have been driving their dates to the movies for the last ten months.

The concept known as "redshirting" is becoming a common choice among parents worried about their children being the youngest in their classes. "60 Minutes" on CBS tonight had a great segment about it, and I'll admit it is something I have thought about before tonight. I recorded the episode for DH to watch it, and I'll be reading the book highlighted in the piece. Malcolm Gladwell's book, Outliers, looks like an interesting read anyways, but I think it will especially be meaningful as DH and I make this decision about our boy.

To Redshirt him or not? That is my great question tonight. Not seeing many cons to the concept, other than another year in preschool/daycare! What do you think? Hold him for a year and let him be one of the oldest in his class or let him join the others even though he'll always be one of the youngest? Fortunately, he does come from tall stock! He is above average in his height and weight. He is about the smartest little fella I've ever met. And thankfully, we still have time to make this decision. We'll see how his first year of preschool goes this fall.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Rock Star Goddess

Do you still see yourself as 18 and young and cute and full of energy, yet you have grey hairs peeking through the dye job you paid too much for 3 weeks ago? Desirable to all the men you pass as you stop at the red light, even though you drive a Momma-van or SUV? Do you wink at the cute guy who works in your building, thinking you're still the most attrative gal in the office, but he secretly snickers to his age buddies that the old lady down hall is really giving him the creeps?

If you envision yourself as that gal who could still quit her job and be a rock star goddess, complete with adoring fans and a sexy body to go along with it, you probably have the right blog. I am that gal. I admit it. (Oi, that stings) My youth is passed, my future as wife and mom is assured so long as I can keep my husband and 3 kids alive. I have a mortgage, a contract job where I'm required to show up everyday in a professional manner, and so many other duties and obligations that you may tire of reading about them.

Sigh. The hardest part of any 12 step program is the first- admit you have a problem. My problem is that I entered that next age bracket without my mental image of myself changing.

Advice for a new generation? We'll work on that as I continue to watch my waistline thicken as I consume the leftover pb n j sandwich on my 2 year old's tray, my pretties. TTFN!